Mother Hen is completely gobsmacked (otherwise known as utterly astounded).
She never dreamed that she would use that term in connection with herself, but there it is. What, you ask, has brought MH to such a state of shock and incredulity?
Shocker #1 Lady Gaga is on Vanity Fair‘s best dressed list!
Unbelievable! Mother Hen thought that she had seen all the potentially ridiculous displays that modern fashion could devise, but since when does a woman who attends a baseball game with her bra in full view merit a commendation for personal style?
Next Mother supposes that the drug-crazed street-walker look that Gaga sports will be on the racks in the kiddie aisles at Wal-Mart!
What? It is already there? Excuse Mother Hen while she reaches for her smelling salts!
Beware all motorists! Eyesight reducing Mardi Gras masks will heretofore be worn in all seasons. Exercise extreme caution! Oh wait, Mother Hen forgot — all the car drivers of the world are wearing them as well. Well, Mother can assure you that this is one chicken who will not be caught crossing the road any time soon!
Shocker #2 Lady Gaga is not only on Vanity Fair‘s best dressed list, she is on the COVER of the Best Dressed Edition.
The only thing saving Mother Hen from a complete apoplectic fit is the amazing irony of it all: Gaga, who is supposedly so well coutured, sports not one apparent stitch of clothing as she poses on the best dressed cover!
The fashionistas at VF have, quite clearly, completely lost their marbles. That being apparent, Mother Hen would like to suggest that we all send them any we can spare, even if just one, in their hour of need.
Address your marbles to:
Mr. Graydon Carter
Editor-in-Chief, Vogue Magazine,
c/o The Conde Nast, Inc.
4 Times Square, 7th Floor,
New York, NY 10o36
Please include a short note explaining why his fashion editors are in need of your marbles (as if it isn’t obvious enough!).
Thank you for supporting this worthy cause!
UPDATE: Tee-hee-hee!!! Lady Gaga wore a meat dress to the VMAs!!! Now Vanity Fair really does have egg on its collective faces!!!! Keep those marbles coming people — the fashionistas at VF are in dire need!