Posts Tagged ‘questions’

Don’t Step on Her Freedoms, and Mother Hen Won’t Step on Yours

All the people with their tail-feathers in a twist over the Muslim building in NYC are missing something that’s as clear as the beak on Mother Hen’s head.

When you limit someone else’s freedom, you automatically limit your own.

If Muslims are not allowed to place a building anywhere in the vicinity of 9/11’s Ground Zero, then logically no Christian structures should exist in Hiroshima or Nagasaki. (Mother has it on good authority [those house cats again] that the US made some very big ka-booms happen in those places.)

If Muslim girls are forbidden to wear headscarves in schools, as Mother H has heard is happening somewhere over the big pond in a place called Your Rope, then you can bet your nest eggs that soon no students there will be allowed to wear crosses or Stars of David around their necks.

Conversely, when you insist on freedom for yourself, you extend that same freedom to everyone else.

If the Ten Commandments were in public buildings, then verses from the Koran should be displayed as well.

If the Lord’s Prayer were to be reinstated in public schools, then Buddhist chants would be acceptable too.

Mother Hen holds these truths to be self-evident.

Don’t give her any nonsense about the nation’s traditions and culture being exclusively Christian either, because that is a pile of cow droppings.  The first freedom established in the USA was the freedom of religion, and that is the nation’s heritage.

You can’t have it both ways, people. Either everyone is free to practice their religion anywhere in the country, or everyone is going to have to accept the same limitations. Yes, that means you too.

That would mean that if Mother Hen thinks your church is too close to her sacred cows, you might have to move your church. Now wouldn’t that cause a squawk! Of course it would, because it just plain wouldn’t be fair!

Limiting people’s actions because of their religious beliefs is a practice that reeks of bigotry and prejudice in the same way Farmer Brown’s pig farm reeks of sweet country air.

Blessed are the peacemakers.

Mother Hen has spoken.

On Eggs, Hen-Pecking, and Female Solidarity

It is time for Mother Hen to weigh in on a timeless debate: which came first, the chicken or the egg?

What is her response to this philosophical dilemma?

“What a ridiculous question! Why would any hen with one iota of common sense care?”

There, that matter having been settled, Mother H. moves on to more relevant matters, matters such as obliterating the blatantly stereotypical term “hen-pecked” from the vocabulary of the masses. How did such a “fowl” term ever come to be part of the human language? defines hen-pecked as “browbeaten, bullied, or intimidated by one’s wife,” and claims it originated in the late 17th century, while pins the year at 1671, for no discernable reason.

Oh, well that explains it all! Chickens had such poor PR during the Baroque period.

Let’s get real, people! Have you ever seen a hen chase a rooster around the barnyard? Of course not! We chickens are too busy sitting on our nests keeping our eggs warm. The survival of the species depends on us, you know!

Female humans in the modern era seem intent on eradicating the word hen-pecked as well, which is all well and good, but do they care about how hens are disparaged and maligned by such a derogatory reference? No, they do not! Apparently they are more concerned with the negative connotations of being associated with chickens and pecking and such. Atrocious!

Now, see here you overgrown chickies! Mother Hen is here to set you straight. Hens are proud and noble birds, with a long heritage of serving the human community. Rather than split feathers over who is more damaged by this barbaric word, let us join together in feminine harmony and kick that nasty, bigoted term right out of the dictionary, and then stomp it, and scratch it, and…um, peck…it…uh…maybe not.

Please forgive Mother if she gets in a bit of a flap when the reputation of the entire female gender is at stake.  This is such an emotional issue!

Males of all species, be ye forewarned!  Use the word hen-pecked again, and Mother Hen will show you what a real hen-pecking looks like!

Downloading Dilemma

My iPodDear Mother Hen,

I take my iPod everywhere. It is practically my BFF! I love my tunes so much, but I read somewhere that you’re not supposed to download songs for free. What’s up with that?

I am only a teenager with a part-time McJob. There is no way I could pay for all my music, so I don’t think it’s fair that some adults out there want to charge us for stuff that we can get for nothing!  Besides, everybody else does it, so what difference does it make?  I’m sure iTunes isn’t going to fold up and die if I don’t use their site, and I don’t see how come they should have my money.

I’m going to keep downloading from the free sites, but I feel just a little guilty about it. I’m not doing anything wrong, right?

Downloading Diva

Dear Downloading Diva,

Here’s what’s up with downloading songs for free.

1.  File sharing copyrighted material is illegal.

I thought I would mention this first, because it ought to matter. True, it is not like a police officer will show up at your door to arrest you or give you a ticket or anything, but that is only because they can’t track you down…yet. You asked about what is right and wrong though, and disobeying the law is wrong, plain and simple.

If there are laws against something, generally it is because someone will get hurt if you do it. Who gets hurt by free downloading ?

2.  Artists get ripped off.

When you don’t pay, guess who doesn’t get paid? Those bands, vocalists, and songwriters that you say you love so much, get nada for their work.  How would you feel if you didn’t get paid for the work you do at your job? I bet that you wouldn’t like it much.

You state that you don’t think it’s fair for you to have to pay for your music because you don’t have a lot of money. Does not having much money make it alright to go into the variety store and lift a pocketful of candy bars? (I hope that your mother raised you right and you said no!)

Downloading music without paying is stealing. That is all there is to it.

3.  It does make a difference.

Let’s say that you have about two thousand songs on your iPod. At ninety-nine cents a tune that comes to $1,980. (Now you are sure you can’t afford it, right?) Think of it this way though. You have taken away almost $2,000 dollars out of the music industry. If every single student in your chemistry class did that (and maybe they do), that would be around $69,300.

There is a lot of controversy about how much money the music industry is losing to file sharing, because if those who download for free had to pay, obviously they would download less, so exact dollar figures are hard to come by. There is no doubt though that they would still be paying for a lot more music than they are now, right? If you and your friends had to pay for your music,  you might have less on your iPods, but more money would go into the music business.

4.   Why should you care?

Reason # 1  Jobs!  There are a many people who depend on the recording industry for their income, and less money going in means fewer jobs for those people.

Reason # 2  Less money means fewer new acts are discovered. Your next favorite band might never get a break if there are fewer talent scouts and auditions.

Reason #3  Making music is hard work, and people should be paid for their work, especially when they are people whose music you love and adore.

Mother Hen realizes that it is tough being a teenager with limited means, but she is not going to tell you it is okay to steal. If you continue to download free music, then she thinks that you probably ought to feel at least a little guilty.  If you don’t pay the price, that’s the price you have to pay.

Mother Hen

Empty Nest Blues

Dear lady with notebook computerMother Hen,

The day I became a mother was the happiest day of my life. I know it isn’t in fashion now, but my husband and I agreed that I should stay at home with our two boys, and I have never regretted the decision for a minute. I got to see their first steps, their first days of school every year, and all of their at-home games.

Now it is time for another first, and I’m not so thrilled. When our eldest boy decided to work for a year to raise more money for college, I was secretly relieved. I wouldn’t have to part with him just yet.

This fall, both boys have been accepted to schools out-of-state. I am already panicking! The house is going to be so empty and I am going to miss them so much. My whole life has been built around my sons. Now what am I going to do?

Soon-To-Be Early Nester

Dear Early Nester,

Fortunately, Mother Hen knows a thing or two about having an empty nest. Both her chicks flew the coop earlier than expected, and rearranging the straw got old really fast. Here are some thoughts on making the adjustment.

1.  Stay busy!

If you have time on your hands without kids around the house, what about volunteering? Take a class in something that you always thought you would like to try, but never got around to checking out. Pursue a hobby. Join a book club (check at your local library). Attend a place of worship, if you are so inclined, and try some of the activities there. Moms can go back to school too, you know — many colleges and universities offer courses geared to mature students, whether you wanted to pursue a degree or diploma, or just take an unaccredited class. Take up a sport suited to the mature adult: tennis, golf, bowling, or curling are four that come to mind.

2. Pursue romance.

You don’t say whether you have a husband or significant other on the scene. If you do, it is time to focus more on the two of you. Suggest a weekend getaway or a full-fledged holiday, something to look forward to and plan for.

Do some of the above (#1) activities together and find something new in common.

If you are on your own, look into activities for singles, or go places where quality guys hang out (see suggestion #1, and find a new interest).

3.  Take care of yourself.

Join a gym. Try an exercise DVD now that there is no one at home to make fun of you!

Pamper yourself with a facial, manicure, or pedicure at home, or if you can afford it, at a spa. Get a new haircut. Buy some new clothes in a style or color that you usually wouldn’t try. Get a massage and/or chiropractic session.

4.  Make more time for friendships.

My mom belonged to a couple of ladies’ social groups that have became her support network as well as being a lot of fun. The Red Hat Society is one example of a group of women who have banded together for female companionship.

If you don’t know of such a club, maybe you can start one. Typical group activities could include: a book club, attending plays, bus trips, scrap-booking, craft sessions, tours, dinner dates, fundraising activity for charity, weekends away, shopping trips, scavenger hunts, car rallies, festivals and so much more!

5.  Stay in touch with the kids.

Write emails. Use a web-cam. Give your sons pre-paid long distance cards. Send care packages. Make up a photo album for each of them. Create a recipe card file of easy or favorite dishes. Send free ecards. Send regular greeting cards by snail-mail. Make up a first-aid kit. Make lunch dates or meet for coffee.

Hope that something here appeals! The main thing is to realize that this is not simply an ending, but a new beginning as well. An old dog may not be able to learn new tricks, but we wise older hens have ways of out-foxing the empty nest blues!

Breaking Up is Hard to Do

Dear Mother Hen,

I thought I had met the “one,” but he just broke up with me! This was my first love, and I thought we would spend the rest of our lives together.  I even moved in with him just a couple of months ago, and now I am on my own again.

I am a mess. I can’t sleep, I’m late on assignments, and just looking at food makes me want to throw up! I burst out crying on the bus today, and everybody was looking at me.woman crying

I don’t know how I’m going to make it through the day most of the time.

My friends all say I’ll get over it, but I don’t think they understand how great the two of us were together.  Sometimes I’m not sure that they ever liked him, because they try to tell me I am better off without him!

What am I going to do if he doesn’t come back?

Broken-Hearted Girl

Dear Broken-Hearted Girl,

Break-ups are tough, and when it is the first time you don’t even have the experience of knowing that you will get over it. All you know is the pain.
Is it possible that you are in love with the person that you thought he was and wished he was, more than the guy who he turned out to be? Could it have been infatuation, which is a passionate attraction, rather than real love, which is based on trust and respect? Over time you will see the differences more clearly, and see him more clearly as well.
You will grieve this loss, and that is only natural, so be kind to yourself while that process takes place. Treat yourself to non-food things and activities that comfort you (bubble baths, a new book, whatever works for you). Don’t spend too much time alone. Give yourself time to gain perspective, and in the meantime, simply put one foot in front of the other. It will get better.  I promise.

Mother Hen

Welcome to Mother Hen’s Nest

Mother Hen loves to answer questions!

As a parent, former teacher, leader of a depression forum, and all around personal adviser, she loves to share what life has taught her so far.

Tell Mother Hen what is bothering you, and she will do her best to help you out.